Dionne (Greenseer)<p>A sense of humour really helps with going through transition and being trans, particularly the ability to have a chuckle at yourself. A common source of gentle smiles is the weird, unexpected moments of gender euphoria</p><p>One such occurred to me yesterday. I had an issue with my bank account that required a phonecall. They have a voice recognition verification process where I have to repeat "My name is ... , my word is my bond". First failure was due to using my 'new' name, forgetting I'd not changed it there. Amazing how natural my now settled name, Dionne, feels to me. But I was confused why two subsequent attempts of dead naming myself (such an overly dramatic term that does me no good, speaking purely personally) also failed</p><p>I realised my voice had changed over the last year or so with little or no conscious effort on my part. For those (cis people) who don't know, estrogen doesn't alter it for AMABs but voice coaching can unlock the enormous hidden versatility of the human voice for anyone. So far I've avoided even self-coaching because I kinda find it a bit cringe. An important hurdle to overcome that I've been told even those taking singing lessons have to get over, is the embarrassment of sounding silly during the process.. and so far I haven't. I've always been very self-conscious and oh my does everything about realising you're trans demand personal growth on that front! It's all good 🤷♀️</p><p>Anyway, the voice is one aspect that still feels too cringe for me to confront. I've watched videos. I've bought a book and it sits there unread. And everyone always tells you that it takes work and the right exercises and that nothing happens otherwise. So it was a lovely and encouraging surprise to find that everyone underestimates the unconscious psychological input into voice. Enough to throw a voice recognition tool off. I had to make an effort to remember how I would have spoken when I first set that security measure up.. and it did take a lot of effort to put that timbre and depth back into my voice. And *that* felt embarrassing and fake</p><p>Honestly, I sometimes think the only useful executive function I have lies in my unconscious. It's how I came out to myself, then came out to others.. and apparently is how I started voice coaching. On reflection, it's how I initiated a whole host of things across my lifetime</p><p>Thanks unconscious me! 💕</p><p>So I kinda floated through an annoying bank chore that would normally stress me, having managed to extract a dose of gender euphoria from an unlikely source. Haven't resolved my account issue yet. Don't really care. Happy to be patient 😊 </p><p>Anyway, I thought I'd share this little personal anecdote as I thought it may be relatable to some other <a href="https://beige.party/tags/trans" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>trans</span></a> people out there and of curiosity to the cis who mostly don't know about such things</p><p>Love you all. The details may differ, but we are all in this human condition, odd creatures that we are. Have a great morning 🥰😘 :BlahajTrans: </p><p><a href="https://beige.party/tags/transfem" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>transfem</span></a> <a href="https://beige.party/tags/lgbtqia" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>lgbtqia</span></a></p>